How to become a more successful network marketing leader so you can be more than enough for yourself and your team is the topic of today’s training. Ray speaks with Laser Coaching Guest on how to actually do that.
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Ray Higdon: Alicia Decker. Alicia, how are you?
Alicia Decker: Hi, how are you? I’m doing good.
Ray Higdon: Nice. Awesome. All right. So Alicia, have you seen these before?
Alicia Decker: Yes.
Ray Higdon: And you still came on?
Alicia Decker: I did. Loyal listener, first-time caller.
Ray Higdon: So tell me, where are you at and where do you think I can help?
Alicia Decker: So I thought a lot about this, and so I have been in Inner Circle for going on a year. Just signed up for my second year, so I feel like I’m doing okay with the consistency part. That was a big thing with me, is getting into consistency and then kind of trailing off. But I was totally reinvigorated by Rank Makers Live again, just the injection that it’s supposed to be and staying invigorated with Kaylee as my coach.
And I think that the thing that I struggle with is that fear of what if this works? What if I actually reach the success that I’m going for? I am the best Ray script user on the planet, and I send my messages, I do my DMO. I can answer anybody with any script.
And I’ve actually closed, recruited four cold prospects, totally cold to me since signing up with Inner Circle, which is totally new. But it’s that coaching them to pass the sign up and feeling confident that I’m good enough to lead them and that I would be okay to lead them and actually achieve that success. I tend to fall back on that fear of, or maybe that doubt of, if it will be enough, will it be enough to reach my own goals or to feel like I’ve accomplished what I’ve set out to accomplish?
Ray Higdon: Well, what be enough? You mean your guidance of them or you mean something else?
Alicia Decker: No, I mean the next thing. I listened to you for years, and like you said, how, okay. I made my million. It was onto the next thing. And I tend to sign up the consultant, be excited onto the next day. And it’s like, when will it feel like I’ve achieved what I’m setting out to achieve? Because I don’t think I’m celebrating that. I’m a little all over the place, but that’s how my brain works.
Ray Higdon: So you’re getting some results, but you’re not really celebrating them. Is that what you mean?
Alicia Decker: Yes. Yes. I’m slowly achieving what I’m setting out to achieve, the results part in terms of I’m recruiting people, but then doing things I know that’s not a me thing. I can’t want it for them and I can’t put them into activity, but I’m excited about getting the consultant, but then I haven’t coached them successfully to
get into activity or to have their own success.
Ray Higdon: So let’s say you’re sending out messages. You send me a message. I decide to
sign up. What do you do next with me?
Alicia Decker: I send you a message and congratulate you or welcoming you to the team. I add you to our team page and welcome you there. I make sure that you sign up for our orientation training that we have. We have a launch training. I send you there and I offer to pay for your first month in Rank Makers. I have done that for every new consultant. I think I’ve had one that actually took me up on it because that one actually wanted to be an activity. So I’m not addicted to them wanting to do that. I say when you’re ready.
Ray Higdon: When do you ask them what their goals are?
Alicia Decker: I’m sorry?
Ray Higdon: When do you ask them what their goals are?
Alicia Decker: When I have that phone call with them after they’ve watched the video and they say that they’re intrigued, or I ask them what they liked best. And then my next thing is, let’s get on a call.
Ray Higdon: That’s before you sign them up.
Alicia Decker: Yes.
Ray Higdon: Okay. So does your response vary based on what they tell you?
Alicia Decker: Yes. So for the couple that I’ve signed up this way, they’ve said either I want to work towards making a little bit of money, and I really haven’t been concrete and say, “Well, how much are you looking to make?” or anything concrete like that. It’s more of a when they ask, “Okay, well, how much time do you spend?” Forest taught me well, my activity aligns with my goals, so your activity would align with your goals. So I don’t know that I ask them their goals necessarily.
Ray Higdon: Because I would want to. So if you reach out cold to someone and say, “Hey, would you like to make some extra money? or something like that, whatever you say, and then they say, “Yeah,” at that point, they’re not vested enough in the relationship to hammer them with a bunch of questions.
But if they’ve seen a video and I follow up with them, which sounds like what you’re doing, and you say, “Hey, what are your goals?” and they say to make money, I want to know. Okay, cool. Now, is there a reason why, or is there urgency? Is there an amount? What are you hoping to make money for? Because that’s your chance to really anchor them down because people really need leadership.
And so when you take the time to find out what specifically are they after, then you have the opportunity to really marry what you’re doing with what they want, and then you find out what’s the urgency. So by doing that, I’ve had people that said, “I have to come up with enough money to put my grandma in a nursing home and I need this amount by this date.” And so I say, Well, if you don’t do this, how do we get the money?” They’re like, “I have no idea. I don’t have a way.” I’m like, “Okay, so there’s a little bit urgency here then.” And they’re like, “Yes.” I’m like, “Got it.”
See, I’m going to treat that person a little different than someone who says, Oh, it’d be nice to make some extra money.” “Cool. Any urgency on there? No, not really. Okay, cool.” I’m not going to shoo them away. I still want them to jump in the team and start tapping in and possibly gain some urgency or gain some higher level of desire, but I’m going to treat them a little differently. Now, either one of them, I’m not going to shame or guilt or push or something like that. I’m going to get them in and say, “Okay, now you mentioned you had to come up with some money. Is it best if I give you an action step? Would that work for you? Or how would you like me to best lead you?” And usually they’ll say, “Yeah, an action step,” and I say, Oh, cool. Well, okay, watch the Fast Start first and come back.” And a lot of people, they don’t … So if I don’t have a gauge on their level of desire, I certainly appreciate you saying I’ll pay for your Rank Makers, but if I don’t know their level of desire, I don’t know if they’re ready for that. If I go to someone and say, “Hey, you want to make extra money?” and they say, “Yeah, okay. I’ll pay for your first semester in medical school” and I go, “All right,” it may or may not be congruent. I may or may not make sense.
And so I want to find out, and just know that people don’t appreciate what they’re given. Usually 99 out of a 100 times, they don’t appreciate it. So I would rather dangle a carrot. And here’s a phrase that we have to always remember, and that is when you want someone to do something, make them qualify for it. And so you think that green light, I’ll offer it to everybody more will do it. What’s interesting is if you make them jump through a hoop, more will do it and more will appreciate it.
And so I might say, “Hey, there’s this group, Rank Makers, I really like, and it’s X amount a month. And that really helps you. However, what I tell my reps is if they go and they get two customers, which we can easily show you how to do, then I’ll actually cover your first month.”
And what you’ll find is more people will see it. Now they see it as not something that they can get for free, but something that, it’s like a prize. So they take it more seriously and some will go out and get the two just to get that fame.
Alicia Decker: That makes total sense.
Ray Higdon: And so that’s logistically what I see with what you’re saying, but when you said what if it works, I’m still not clear on what your issue is with that.
Alicia Decker: So my fear is, so I work full time. I have kids like we all do, so I’m busy. And my fear is, how am I going to support and to lead a big team?
Ray Higdon: So you draw size of team is going to take away time I already don’t have.
Alicia Decker: Kind of.
Ray Higdon: Okay, what’s the clarifier there? What am I missing?
Alicia Decker: Yeah, no, you’re right. Yes.
Ray Higdon: And just so you know, anytime you have that, you have to sabotage. So what’s your full-time job?
Alicia Decker: I’m a pharmacist.
Ray Higdon: And you like that? It’s probably a good paying job, I imagine. So probably a lot of hours, though, right?
Alicia Decker: I work for the government, so I’m pretty much like eight hours a day, Monday through Friday. And I’m an administrative level, so my hours are pretty set.
Ray Higdon: How long you been there?
Alicia Decker: Over 18 years.
Ray Higdon: So there’s probably a 20 year better retirement package or something.
Alicia Decker: Yeah. Honestly, yes, there is, but I’m looking for more. I’ve stopped growing and I’m looking for more. I’m doing a lot of meditation and a lot of manifesting of something more, not necessarily in my network marketing business, but even in my career where I can have more impact because my impact is definitely not like it used to be. So I’m doing a lot of work outside of that, a little bit with Kaylee and a lot bit out with some other of my friends that were working together to kind of building the dream position.
Ray Higdon: Two things I see here is, one, if you have this feeling that I’m currently maxed out on time, a bigger team would require more time, then you have to sabotage it. You just have to. And it doesn’t have to be that way. With better management of time, you could have ten times the size of team, more production in same amount of time, really. And so one doesn’t have to equal the other.
If you’re wanting to create change in your job, the fastest way and the coolest way is if you follow some of Neville Goddard’s trainings. So Neville Goddard, and I’ve listened to so much of his training. I can’t tell you where some of these conversations will be because I’ve just watched so many of the YouTube videos and stuff. But there’s one that this reminds me of this. Actually, there’s two stories that I’ve specifically heard through Neville. One of them was his buddy who was a script writer, and he would write scripts for whatever TV shows or something. And so he’d write scripts, he’d send it in, and the producer or whoever would say, “Oh, good. Thank you.” Have you heard this one?
Alicia Decker: Maybe, maybe, but I’ve heard a lot of the stuff over and over, so you can tell me again.
Ray Higdon: And so the script writer tells Neville. He’s like, “It’s so annoying. Every time I write them, it’s like, oh good. It’s nothing.” And Neville says, Well, just see him saying something else. See him saying something else, and what would that feel like?”
And so he thinks about it and he sees him saying, “This is great.” And so he sends it in, and it may have taken a little bit, but eventually he comes back to him. He goes, “Hey, this is great.” He’s like, “Oh, man, maybe this stuff is working.” And he goes, “I’m going to have him say this is awesome.” And then he takes a look. “This is awesome.” Then he said, “Okay, what’s something that he would just never say, like ever?” And so eventually it leads to “This was stupendous.” And so he took them from years of this is good to great to awesome to stupendous.
And then the other story I heard was this guy who, he hadn’t finished college, but this position he was going for required college. And he was asking Neville, “Should I go to college?” And he said, “Just see yourself in that position, feel what would it be like. Just see yourself as that, not in the future, but right now.” And so he started doing that, and the company ends up rewriting the rules so that he can be in that position and he gets that position.
And so don’t think that you’re limited to the confines of what you have.
I’d probably first see and feel what it would feel like if your boss, all of a sudden said, “You know what, Alicia? We have a position opening up and we’ve been considering you for it,” or whatever your circumstance, but I would start to see exactly what you want and feel as if it is right now and not in the future, not wishing upon or anything like that, but a wish fulfilled. And so I would test that out. And this is something I’m currently doing something on a project around this, but I’ve had it happen multiple, multiple times.
An interesting one doesn’t pertain exactly to your situation, but an interesting one was Neville consulted Teddy Roosevelt’s wife, and his wife came to Neville and was saying, “Hey, we have these two apartments, and we got to get this one rented so we can go here and I want to go here, but we don’t have this one rented.” And so I think it was Long Island and Oyster Bay, I think were the two things. And so she wanted to be in the Long Island apartment, but to do that, she had to rent the Oyster Bay one and no one had inquired about it.
And so he said, “Tonight, I want you to sleep in the Long Island one.” And she’s like, “Well, I can’t. Oyster Bay.” He goes, “I know, I know.” He goes, “Physically, you sleep in the Oyster Bay one, but I want you to feel as if you’re sleeping in the Long Island one. I want you to see yourself and everything that has to do with Long Island, feel as if you are sleeping there and you’re physically going to be there, but you see yourself, you feel yourself being in that other one.”
And so she calls him the next day and she goes, “You’re not going to believe this.” And she goes home to the Oyster Bay one. Someone contacted them and needed the apartment immediately, so she actually ended up sleeping in the Long Island one that night.
And so just the power that we have that people don’t understand, and so for me, the fastest things that have worked for me is seeing other people have conversations to me. So if I said, “Okay, what is it that I want? How would I know it’s true? And what would that look like?” And then I start to see the participating actors and actresses around that play or whatever, how would someone congratulate you if you were in a different job or a different position or different hospital or whatever?
And so what would they say? What would the email announcing it look like? What would the head doctor say, or the head pharmacist or whatever, would you be the head pharmacist? What are all the surrounding evidence that would contribute to that, and just don’t break from that. See and feel as if that is true. And did you hear me talk about Neville and his mentor Abdullah?
Alicia Decker: I have the Neville Goddard quote that you did, and I have it written next to me at all times about when your feelings are in conflict with your wish. So that one I’ve got next to me. When I telework, this is where I sit.
Ray Higdon: So this fairly mysterious guy from Ethiopia was named Abdullah, and he trained Dr. Joseph Murphy, who wrote The Power of your Subconscious Mind, and he also trained Neville Goddard. He was their mentors and they went on to do amazing things. And so it was the late 20s and Neville was a struggling dancer because everyone was in depression and everyone’s out of work and no one’s hiring dancers, and Neville goes to Abdullah and he’s like, “Man, I’m dead broke. I really want to visit my home island of Barbados, but I got no money at all.” And Abdullah says, “See yourself in Barbados. Smell the salty breeze, see the little houses when you go to sleep, see yourself in Barbados.” And so Neville was like, “Oh, okay.”
And a couple months later, he’s been doing this to the best of his ability, and he goes to Abdullah and he says, “Hey, I’m trying to get money to get this trip to Barbados.” And he goes, “Why would you buy a ticket to somewhere you already are?” And that’s the level of conviction. And so he’s like, “Okay,” and he keeps doing his thing. And then all of a sudden out of the blue, because we forget when we set the intention of things and we think that, oh, it’s just a coincidink. It just happened. And so he gets sent a ticket from his brother to come to Barbados, and so he gets this ticket in the mail and he’s super excited. He goes down to the yacht yard or whatever, and they say, yes, you’re confirmed, but we don’t have you first class, but you can definitely be on the ship.
And so he goes to Abdullah and says, “I have good news. I got a ticket and my brother sent it, and I won’t be on first-class, but I’m excited.” And Abdullah says, “You went first-class,” slams the door in his face. Wasn’t even happy that he got a ticket, didn’t even knowledge that he got a ticket, and he just rolled his eyes. You still don’t get how powerful you are, slams the door in his face. He said, “You weren’t first class.” And so Neville was like, “Geez.” Sees himself first-class, he goes down there, and on the day of it, they had a cancellation so he went first class.
And so there’s only thousands of those kinds of stories. And so I would see that in your job situation, that’s definitely how I would play that card, is I would see what is it that I actually want? What does that look like, feel like? How would I feel? Who would acknowledge it? What would they say? And I would see that entire scenario. As far as on the network marketing side, we didn’t really go deep into your past because if you’re consistent, then we’re not yet at a place where I think we need to do that. And so you just need to understand that it is very, very possible to have an extremely large team and it not eat up all your time if you have the right systems in place.
Alicia Decker: Yeah. I totally can see that. And I love the stories I’ve heard. I’ve heard you tell us that ship one, the Barbados one before, but it’s still very powerful, and yeah, I’ve been working on that visualizing, but I don’t think I’ve put the players in. I’ve been writing what I want based on what I have now that I don’t want, so I’ve been journaling the situation that I want to happen or the environment, but I haven’t gone this step further of the other people.
Ray Higdon: That’s one of the most powerful ways. To me, it’s when I’ve said, okay, what would that look like? And even today … What did I have happen today? I had another one of these things happen where I had seen the conversation and it literally happened verbatim, and so I now have this happen so often that it’s just like, oh, this is amazing.
Alicia Decker: And those play for me a lot. When you told this story on the, whatever, I can’t even think of … the Make Rank Make Bank, and you told the story about meditating, about working out, and then just telling you the Jack story. So I think about that and I had come and told you about the story of my mom, me picturing losing weight and then my mom asked me if I lost weight. It’s very powerful. And I’m a really good story listener, and it’s the putting it into place a lot of times where I block myself, and I’m definitely have been working on this self-sabotage thing, but I’m getting better every day. That’s a thing in my past, and I’m getting better every day. And I’m grateful that I’m getting better at it every day. I told you I could speak right. I could speak right all day long, but yeah, super helpful.
Ray Higdon: And the other thing is I think that it’ll help tomorrow’s training. I’m talking about the little voice and I think that’ll help too, but you doing that work, that mental work on altering the job, I think will actually create, only because if you weren’t consistent, I wouldn’t be saying this, but because you’re consistent, I think that work over here is going to alter how you about this over here. And so I think it’ll be cool.
Alicia Decker: Yeah. And I’m excited. I definitely need to look at getting systems in place because I kind of wing it with new consultants, and I think that that’s where I need to put some work into putting some systems.
Ray Higdon: We definitely do because then you’ll have the faith that the systems are in place. As long as you feel like you’re winging it, then your only conclusion is either you’re not doing a great job or it’s going to require more time for you to do a good job, and neither of those are great scenarios.
Alicia Decker: Totally. I already have the scripts in my head of what the next step is. That’s totally helpful.
Ray Higdon: All right. So helpful? Good stuff?
Alicia Decker: Super helpful.
Ray Higdon: All right. Well, everyone give Alicia a hand. Great job tonight, super excited. I’m interested to see how your job scenario works out and everything and keep rocking and rolling. Very, very cool.
Alicia Decker: And if my boss is watching, then whoops.
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