Most outreach scripts are working against you.
Without an understanding of psychology and position, the message you send is training your prospect to ignore you. It signals desperation before you even explain what you sell.
Here is the framework Ray Higdon teaches for reaching out to both warm and cold market, without coming across as pushy, spammy, or out of position.
Rule #1: Never Hype Out of Position
Position is the single most important concept in outreach. It refers to where your prospect actually is, not where you want them to be.
When you reach out to someone for the first time, assume they are at position zero. You do not know if they are interested. You do not know if they have a desire. You do not know if they are looking for anything at all.
Even if a friend posts on social media about wanting to lose weight, that does not mean they are ready for your offer. Sometimes people post for attention, not solutions. Over-assuming their position is how you repel people before the conversation even starts.
Posture Check: Spam is not about volume. Spam is over-assuming the position of the prospect. If your post says “this opportunity is amazing, you have to reach out to me,” you are spamming, even if it is on your own page.
The safer move is to verify. A simple outreach like “I saw you post about finding a good shampoo. I found one that really works. Want me to send you more info?” meets them where they are without overshooting.
Rule #2: Know Your Market and Lead with One Thing
There are two primary categories of prospects: warm market and cold market.
Warm market is typically friends and family, but it can extend further. As Ray notes, the late great Mark Yarnell considered anyone from a shared past occupation to be warm market. If you are a nurse, a teacher, or a pilot, your warm market may be far larger than you think.
For warm market outreach, ask yourself one critical question before you say a word: how do they see me?
If your friends and family do not see you as an entrepreneur, leading with the business opportunity will feel strange to them. Lead based on how they perceive you, not based on what your company contest wants this week.
One rule applies everywhere: never lead with both the product and the opportunity at the same time. If you pitch health and wealth in the same breath, you will not know which one they are rejecting. Lead with one. If they pass, roll to the other.
Posture Check: Great salespeople do not close everyone. They quickly find out whether someone has a problem, pain, or desire they can solve. If they do not, they move on. Your job in outreach is sorting, not convincing.
Rule #3: Use Scripts That Get to the Point
Your initial outreach script should be short. It should communicate the benefit, not the features, not the ingredients, not the backstory.
Ray offers three proven frameworks:
For warm market (someone you have not talked to in a while):
“Hey, it’s been too long. I would love to catch up. But listen, I am focused on a project right now. This project helps with [blank], and your name popped into my head. Would you be open to taking a look at what I am doing? If not, totally cool. I want to catch up either way.”
Key: if they say no, still follow through on catching up. Build rapport after the no, not before the ask. Attempting to build rapport before the ask reads as underhanded. Building it after a no is genuinely powerful.
For warm market (standard approach):
“Hey, you may or may not know this, but I am a rep for a company that helps with [blank]. Would you be open to taking a look at what it is that we are doing?”
Use the word open, not interested. “I’m not interested” rolls off the tongue easily. “I’m not open” creates just enough friction to make someone pause and reconsider.
For cold market (the intelligent comment approach):
Identify influencers and pages that attract the type of person you want to work with. Look for intelligent comments in those communities. Click the profile, note their occupation, and send a message that ties their comment to their work and to what you offer.
“Hey, I saw your post on [page]. I agreed with you a hundred percent. I also see that you are a realtor. We actually help realtors make extra money that does not interfere with what they are currently doing. Would you be open to taking a look at what it is that we are doing?”
This message answers two questions cold prospects always ask: what do you want, and why are you messaging me? If you cannot answer both, they assume it is a bot and move on.
Posture Check: Cold market does not want you to beat around the bush. Use the word we to represent the company, not just yourself. Keep the message short, benefit-focused, and specific to them. If they say no, respond with “No problem. Do you know anyone who would want to [benefit]?” then move on. If they do not respond at all, move on. Do not chase.
If they say yes, offer to send a video that explains it better than you could in a message. Let the tool do the work.
Outreach Is Sorting, Not Selling
Stop approaching outreach as if you need each person to say yes.
Your job is to see who is open. That shift in mindset changes everything, including the energy behind your message. People can feel desperation through a screen. They can feel genuine confidence too.
The reps who build real businesses are not the ones with the most elaborate pitches. They are the ones who reach out consistently, stay in position, and do not make any single prospect the prize.
If you want to go deeper on how posture affects every stage of the sales conversation, including what happens after the initial reach out, check out the free 90-minute training at Posture, Persuasion & Closing the Sale. It will sharpen the skills that make outreach actually convert.
